Living A Life That Matters

In working with my clients, I help facilitate how they can live a life that matters rather than living an un-lived life which dovetails into Mark Nepo's The Book of Awakening:Having the Life You Want by being present to the life you have which speaks directly to the centerpiece of my work as a psychotherapist.  In this, his "wisdom" book, Nepo has an entry of wisdom for every day with an exercise.  It is way, a useful and mindful way, to greet each day with an affirmation about what should be valued in life.  


So much of us inherit lives and behaviors that we've adapted.  When we arise each day, there is a knowing we are NOT happy, there is no joy, there may be depression and often addictions commonly occur. Awakening to this often happens late in the game.  But never too late to seek help and support.  Life is not always perfect, we are met with pain and loss in a variety of ways.  How we respond is key to how we live our lives.


Being attuned with my clients, unlocking those gates of oppression and self doubt, insecurity and loss, they can be reunited with their core, to own their voice and to promote a sense of well being.  I enjoy being a witness to this unfolding process.  It is often helpful for clients to have a touch stone, something with which they can use or have each day as a reminder of who they are and how they want to live their lives.  Utilizing the motivational vignettes addressed in Nepo's book,  through his own experience of a life examined, his entries on love, loss, friendship, cancer, can be such a beginning and a companion to this process of becoming or awakening.


With my families my metaphor is the "team" and how everyone needs to participate on this team in order for it to function, prosper and be successful.  Working with couples, I model a process of attunement, helping them to "get" the other to truly see their partner with empathic responses, making their communication direct, getting out of your own way in order to healing the relationship, allowing love to re-enter.  It's amazing to see this shift in the room.  To be a witness to the epiphany that takes place is a gift.  With cancer patients and their families there's another gift of providing hope and helping them navigate the emotional terrain. No matter who I am seeing, the work is  a process which I find holy and am awakening more and more to each new day living a life that matters.